Friday, November 5, 2010

THE MUSING OF PRIMORDIAL OOZE


YOU THINK YOU'RE CONSCIOUS BUT YOU'RE NOT.

In truth, everything you know/knew IS A LIE. Not simply on the level of "THE CAKE IS A LIE." No, something far greater, more encompassing. You think you've watched time ticking, you thought that the clock's been twitching in the corner there, but you know what? YOU THOUGHT WRONG. BECAUSE TIME NEVER STOPS AND YOU WON'T KEEP UP.

If life's a train, you're that piece of luggage that went flying out from the rear and then sprouted legs as you try to hop back on that train. And because you sprouted legs, there are holes in your body and all the stuff that you're trying to hold inside is falling out because you're sprinting like crazy and you're trying to chuck stuff along the way so you can run faster. RUN FASTER HARDER STRONGER.

And then what? Eventually, you don't have anything left and you're panting and panting and never catching up. And then the train arrives. And then it becomes A BOAT. AND NOW YOU'RE STRANDED, AND NOW ITS OVER. Except you're tired, you're sore, and you don't have anything. Oh. And you're a suitcase that sprouted legs. Wow that sucks.

Frick, it's like.... Hogwarts Express meets the elf-ship from Lord of the Rings. You're all enthused when you get on life, life runs too fast and you get thrown off, and you're stuck in limbo when the ship leaves. And drowning with nothingness because life is chaos but you don't have time to stop to check it out, see what it's all about.

And somewhere along that line, you're running so much that you're pretty much indistinguishable from a blob. Primordial ooze. Because that's what you are - simply a biological sack of cells. You've run so hard, you can't do anything but think about RUNNING HARDER, forgetting why you're running, what you're running to, everything. You're exhausted, sure. But you know what, oozes don't care, they just keep oozing on and you OOZE ONWARDS.

You're drowning in life - there's so much to take in but you sure as hell aren't taking it in, no you're just trying to get up and out. You rise above the waves, get a few breaths if you're lucky, and then you're dragged back to the life of ooze and running. Because the train's faster than you and always will be - how far you are behind depends on when you get thrown off.



Edit: Wow, frick I'm tired/exhausted/angry/annoyed/irritated/nostalgia-tripping. I feel so old when I hear random freshmen going "Oh man, I remember that Gameboy SP, first console/handheld ever. Wicked fun games." and I go, "Well frick, I remember duck hunt and mission control as MY first games." And then I'm trying to balance all these little things together because all of a sudden, I need a schedule for life because I sure as hell can't keep up with all the stuff I want to do and all the stuff I NEED to do. I've had a really screwy sleep schedule this week that's making me all irritated and stuff - god, never pulling off all-nighters again. So useless and I still failed that test. And I feel like I should save my comments/response to comments (which is what this post was gonna be) to creative writing to sometime in the future when I'm not super SNARK/CRUNCHONYOURFACEFORWAVINGHAND so I don't offend people. Primordial ooze. THIS IS MY LIFE.

EditEdit: I love how my edit was super angry/irritated anyways when I was trying to not be angry. And now I feel bad for those of you who were reading this and were like "rage-rant what."

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